Wii, Wii, Wii all the way home!

Well, I am still loving the Wii. So much so, that it is almost a battle around my house to get time on it. My husband wants to Wii. My daughter only wants to Wii when I want to Wii, and so it is a struggle to Wii around here.

I did go out and buy myself a new game, The Biggest Loser. Has anyone tried it? I paid $40 for it at GameStop and to be honest, I'm not terribly impressed. It is very serious and the trainers say the same thing over and over again. I get the repetition from the Fit Plus game that I paid $20 for, so I guess I was hoping for something better from Biggest Loser. Maybe I haven't played it enough, but if it doesn't improve, I'm going to be putting it up on craigslist soon.

What are your favorite Wii games?

Starting Over Again!

I quit Weight Watchers!  Yup! I lost 50 pounds and quit yesterday. Yup, I have over 100 more pounds that I need to lose, but I quit. Nope, I didn't cancel my membership and I didn't tell my leader that I was quitting, but I quit.

The good news is....I'm starting over today! I think when a person has over 25lbs to lose that is what they need to do. They need to reach a goal and celebrate their success. Tell themselves, "WooHoo! You did it, now you can quit!" Then start back up the next day, knowing that they succeeded at losing 25 lbs before and they can do it again!

When I look at my weight and think about the monumental task at hand, I can't help but be frustrated. How can I possibly lose a total of 189 lbs...and that will just get me to #150. Which while that is in the "healthy BMI range" and will qualify me for Lifetime membership, it is at the upper levels of the range. I can tell myself, "WooHoo! You have lost 50lbs on WW and a total of 79lbs!" But there is always a "but". But you need to lose 110 more! But you still aren't there yet. But you have never been below 180 lbs since puberty!

I'm tired of the Buts and I'm tired of my butt, but that is off topic....So, I quit!

And I am restarting again; focusing on the next 8lbs which will be another 10% off and ultimately the next 25lbs!

Yay!!! 50 lbs!!!!

I hit it on the dot!!! 50lbs! Gone!!! WooHoo!!!

The subject of our meeting was toot your own horn, so I'm tooting!!! I'm also wearing my 25lb ring/weight thing and 50lb. ring/weight thing on a necklace. Too much??? I don't know....But they sure are pretty!!!

We had a great meeting today. We had a new leader who was great only to find out that she won't be with us in the new year due to childcare conflicts. So, we will have to break in another person in January.

The highlight of the day came from my 3 year old who attended the meeting with me. She was telling her aunt about her day and was asked what the WW meeting was about. She said, "I don't know, but they talked about their toots." LOL

WoooHooo for the Wii

Our family decided to get a group present this year! We bought a Wii with the Wii fit. My daughter and I brought it home and with my husband's permission, we wrapped it really pretty and put it under the tree... Ok, so we opened it right up and got to playing it. We had to test it out right?

I will admit that when these came out, I was very skeptical. I mean who would imagine burning any calories playing a video game. I am or was VERY anti-video game. Who has time to sit around and play games? Not me! I'm too fidgety to do all that. The Wii is different people would tell me. Yeah, right! Now, I'm one of those Wii believers!

I love it! Between the four of us, we Wiied for over 6 hours! I did yoga, strength training, aerobics, balance exercises, bowled, played golf and tennis. It was great! I also tried out the boxing. That sure felt good too! I'm going to have to remember that when I get stressed!

So, tell me...do any of you have a Wii? What are your favorite games? Do you work up a sweat on it?

Just 1.2 lbs to go!!! (until I get my 50lb weight for WW's)

WooHoo! Today was a great weigh in day! I lost 2.2lbs and realized that I am 1.2lbs from my WW's 50 lb weight. Can I do that this week??? I think so. I'm going into this week totally positive about it. I'm going to focus on activity and counting my points this week and hope for the best! What a great Christmas present to myself a 50lb. weight would be!

Thinking about this week coming up, I only foresee one challenge. We are having a Christmas program at church Sunday morning in which the staff serve up cookies and punch to the congregation afterward.  I did volunteer to make hot cocoa and punch instead of baking cookies this year. I really don't need to spend several hours in the kitchen baking cookies. I am also going to make fresh mozzarella and bring crackers.

How is everyone else doing? 

My Quest for More Veggies!

First off, I don't get paid or anything for posts like this one. If I ever do, I will say that it is.

Rouse's, our local grocery store, had a sale on Dole salad kits this week. Complete salads for $1. The points range from 3-4 points per serving. Each bag has 3.5 servings. I'm wondering who is going to eat the .5 of a serving? Hmmmm



Photo by Flickr user VeganWarrior                Anyway, they have several different flavors to choose from. I picked up the Caesar, Asian, Autumn Splendor and Hearty Italian. I have not tried the Asian yet, but hope to soon. Here are my reviews on the others:

The Caesar was good. The shavings of Parmesan and Romano cheese were HUGE! Some of them were over 3 square inches. The croutons were tasty, but the dressing had too much vinegar for my taste.

The Hearty Italian was pretty good. I like the cubes of cheese and salami. The dressing fell short for me again. I am not a wine drinker and don't like super yeasty tastes, so this dressing was deeply offensive to my palate. I ended up making my own Balsamic vinaigrette dressing and using that for my salad.

The final salad was the Autumn Splendor which isn't listed on their website. It contains lettuce, pumpkin seeds, dried cranberries, croutons and a pumpkin vinaigrette. This one is a home run! I loved it! From start to finish, it was perfectly balanced and just what I wanted to go with my vegetable soup. I only hope that this isn't a seasonal salad, because I will be very disappointed in the springtime.

Dole has a whole line of these salads out that I can't wait to try.  I hope to find the Winter Jubilee in my grocery store soon. I am a huge blue cheese fan.

Each of the salads also come with this funny little packet of seasonings. Although I haven't done a comparison all together, they all seem to be the same thing. They do help the bits of salad that lack dressing. I love that all the pieces are in separate little pouches, so I can mix and match what I want on the salad. It is very convenient.

One of the things that is really annoying to me is that the nutrition label lists the nutritional information as all one thing. Since I tossed the salad dressing on two of these in favor of my homemade dressing, I had a huge debate as to how many points each of the other components were. Even on the pumpkin dressing that I loved, I didn't consume a whole serving each time I ate it, because I had plenty of leftovers. If they don't want to use up label space with the nutritional info for each of the components, they could at least put it on their site, which is another one of my issues. While I understand that they are trying to be cutting edge with their site and make fruits and vegetables seem cool, their site sucks! We have the highest DSL speed offered, but their site drags. I click, I wait for the animated lady to look at what I'm doing. Just give me the info already! I can't imagine visiting their site on my parent's cable modem or my sister's DSL light.

My plan for the month is to eat a salad and/or vegetable soup for one meal every day to help account for those holiday meals where the calorie counts are stacked against my weight loss efforts.Anyway, what are you doing to keep your holiday plans from sabotaging your weight loss plans?

December 2009

December 2009
Originally uploaded by tenlittlefingers2littlehands

Here is a new progress photo! Watch the slide show at the top for all of my progress photos

A Thanksgiving Gain...1.6 pounds

I knew I was in for a gain this week even before I stepped on the scale this morning. Last week, I lost 2.6 lbs, so I just knew that this week was going to be bad. It always seems to happen that way.

So, was it self-fulfilling prophesy? or the simple facts of knowing how my body works? I'm not sure, but I am up 1.6 lbs. this week. What is strange is that I no longer have the defeatist attitude about it that I once did. A month ago, I would have been ready to throw in the towel and give up. I mean really, Lori, you have been over 275 lbs. your entire adult life. How can you ever expect to lose weight? Who are you kidding? Besides you are comfortable here at 260ish...let's just throw in the towel, save the $40 bucks a month and spend it on chocolate.  Anyone else have that little voice in your head? Maybe it is just me, but I know that I must silence that voice or I will end up back at 339 or more!

Well, this gain is only temporary. It will be gone next week and hopefully, it will take some of its friends with it. I am (with the gain) 3 pounds away from a new WW milestone of 50 lbs. So, off we go to see if I can do it this week!

My tip for the week...eat more veggies!!! Looking back at my meals this past week, my fruit and vegetable servings were seriously lacking. So during our meeting today, we talked about food finds and one of the ladies talked about these Green Giant Just for One vegetables. They are zero or 1 point servings size portions. They steam in the microwave in their little package for 2 minutes. It is a great little snack or an addition to a frozen dinner. I bought the Cauliflower & Cheese Sauce, Broccoli & Cheese Sauce and Broccoli, Carrots & Italian Seasoning today at Wal-Mart. At $2.98 for a 4 pack, I'm not thrilled with the price. I tried the Cauliflower & Cheese Sauce today and seasoned it with a little Tony Chachere's Creole Seasoning. I must admit that it was very tasty, and I'm not a huge fan of cauliflower either. For the points, they sure didn't skimp on the cheese sauce.

Well, now I'm off to check out everyone else's blog and see how we are all doing! Have a great Wednesday!

Not Me Monday

It's that time of week again and I'm here to tell you what I've NOT been up to these days!

Well, I did not eat too much for lunch on Thursday like I'm sure that all of you didn't either. After polishing off all the turkey leftovers on Saturday, I did not cook a turkey breast in my slow cooker and force the entire family to again consume turkey so soon after Thanksgiving. (My parents let the turkey breast thaw and it had to be cooked, so technically it really isn't my fault...I could not let good meat go to waste, right?)

On the subject of turkey, I will totally not be cooking yet another one on Sunday for our church holiday dinner. And then again for Christmas, New Years, Valentine's Day and Easter! When I can get meat for 40 cents a pound, I can't help myself.  No, we totally did not somehow end up with 5 whole birds and a breast in our house in a matter of a few days.

Speaking of food, I am not sucking down 5-6 one liter bottles of water every day in hopes of flushing all the sodium and extra food from my system before I weigh in on Wednesday for fear of gaining this week. I did have a great weigh in on Wednesday and don't know how things will fall this week.

I did not eat a handful of butterscotch chips just because I wanted the Tupperware bowl that they were in to put something else in it tonight after I had run out of points.

After teaching a Sunday school lesson about Greedy Pete, the little boy who got greedy and ended up having spots all over his face from catching the Greedies, I did not tell my husband that the next time our little Butterbean got greedy, I was going to tell her that I am seeing greedy spots on her face. What kind of mother would do that anyway?

And about the chickens...I did not spend my holiday swapping out the nest boxes for the old buckets that I used first in hopes that they wouldn't poop in the buckets like they did the milk crates. I also didn't swap out the metal roosting pole for a 12 foot 2x4 just because the Backyard Chicken website said that they would like a 2x4 better and I was worried that their little feet would be too cold on the metal pole. I am not that into my chickens that I would go so far as to do that....or maybe I am.

Thanksgiving is a memory, but the leftovers live on...

It is over! I survived. Yes, I ate too much. Yes, I need to hop on that bike and get some activity points in before I weigh in on Wednesday. My first focus though is getting back on my water. Seems like for the past couple of days, I haven't been drinking as much water as I normally do. With all the salt in the Thanksgiving foods, I need to flush the sodium out of my system before I hit the scale again.

For Thanksgiving, I set the table with the red table clothes, our china and all of my holiday wares. It was lovely. I made sure to put both a dinner plate and salad plate in each spot, so those of us who are dieting could use the smaller plate and fool our eye. It totally worked! Well, it worked for my sister and I. Some of the men at the table thought that the salad plate was for the over flow of what wouldn't fit on their dinner plate. I threatened to photograph a couple of their plates, so I could post it here, but they wouldn't let me. Even so, I think my total dinner was 20 points, but I did eat a light breakfast and supper. I did eat the pecan pie...I know I shouldn't have, but I did and I finished it off today.

The great thing is that even when I mess up, I can start again tomorrow. Today's failures don't define me anymore. It is what I do each day that makes a difference.

Lost 1.2 this week!

WW loss total 46 lbs.
Total loss 75 lbs.
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Lost 2.6 lbs, but. . .

IMG00345-20091112-0817
Originally uploaded by tenlittlefingers2littlehands

Since I gained 3.4 last week, I'm still up by .8 lbs. Funny thing was...even though I lost 2.6, the WW lady who weighed me in didn't say anything but, "OK, I got you." I had to grab my book and look at it to see what had happened on the scale! I was so scared that I had another gain. That is what they do when you gain. They say, "I got you." or "OK, you can get down." When you lose, this lady in particular normally gives a thumbs up and tells you how much you are down.She is normally much more positive.

Granted, I know I'm still at a net gain over the past 2 weeks, but hey...I still LOST! I'm proud of my loss too! Sure, I have a net gain for 2 weeks, but let's look at the past:


4 Weeks - loss of 3 lbs.

12 Weeks - loss of 8 lbs.

24 Weeks - loss of 25.6 lbs.

Since starting WW in March - 44.8 lbs.

Since starting my weight loss journey - 73.8 lbs. And that is based on their scale...mine says that I have lost 77 lbs.


I have gotten back on the horse! I have picked myself up and am focused on my goal. I'm going to do this! I set a goal of 10 lbs by Thanksgiving. I am currently 4.8 down with 5.2 lbs to go. I have 2 weeks. I am NOT giving up! I can do this! I will do this. Honestly, I just have to keep the same 2.6 lb loss that I had this week.



The other thing is that I do just what I think she was doing. I tell myself, "Sure, you lost 2.6 lbs this week, but you gained 3.4 last week." I rob myself of the success of the loss, because I'm still focused on the gain. Sure, I tell myself that I have let go of the "failure" of the gain, but then when I have a success, I don't really feel like I can celebrate it, because I'm still behind where I was two weeks ago. It is really stupid of me. I'm still ahead of where I was one year, two years, ten years, even twenty years ago, so today I vow not to beat myself up about it. I vow to keep things in perspective and focus on the future.


I'm sorry that the WW lady wasn't thrilled with my loss, but I am!

Also, here's my November progress photo. Note the little princess in the photo blowing up a swimming float! I'm not seeing a huge difference month to month, but the progress photos really help me see it.

Flickr

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.

Bad Blogger!

I'm terrible! Not only have I not posted in a couple of weeks, I have not been keeping up with all my blogging friends! I promise to do better. That said, life has been crazy around here!

Yes, we do have a tropical storm in the gulf that we are watching. Yes, it is strange to have one pop up in November, but not too strange. We have had them in December. Ida appears to be heading to Mobile/Pensacola, so we are good. We are getting some winds and rain, but nothing major. 

I lost 2.2 lbs a couple of weeks ago, but gained 3.4 lbs the week of Halloween! I need to get back to my focus. I need to go back to eating more fruits and vegetables. I need to get back to riding the bike. I know what I need to do, but just don't have much motivation right now. Anyone else ever feel that way?

The Difference a Year Makes

Both of these photos were taken at the Lacombe Wild Things events. One was October 18, 2008 and the other October 17, 2009. What a difference a year makes! 75lbs lighter and a whole lot healthier! Can't wait to see the 2010 picture!

A gain this week and Aunt Purple's Cooking

I hate to admit it, but I gained .5 this week. I think I'm about to get a gift from Mother Nature, but since I have PCOS, I never know when I'm going to have a period. Hopefully, this gain is just water. Time will tell, but I'm going to stick to the plan and know that it works.

Another recipe site for losers! Check it out and let me know what you think. I'm thinking about making the pumpkin dump cake for our Bible study group next time. http://www.auntpurple.blogspot.com/
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Something Fun!

Go try out Wordle!

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Hmmm...let's see what have I not been up to this week. I was awaken early Sunday morning by a phone call from my mother saying that Dad was unable to urinate and they were taking him to the ER. I did not listen to my mother and decide to take my 3 year old with me to the hospital instead of sending her with her daddy to church. I mean what kind of crazy woman takes a healthy 3 year old to a hospital waiting room. I did not pull one of her Christmas gifts out of the closet and stash it in my purse for when she got bored. As expected, she loved the Hello Kitty art set. Furthermore,  I did not explain to my 3 year old on the way over that Poppa "was having trouble tinkling" and needed to go to the doctor to get help. She, of course, did not announce loudly and repeatedly in the waiting room, much to the amusement of the other folks, that her Poppa was having "tinkle troubles."

I think that is enough confessions for this week! How was your week?

WW's Grandma's Pumpkin Muffins

While shopping the other day, my little Butterbean found a little pumpkin in the produce department at our local grocery store. We have a rule that when we go to the grocery store she can pick out anything from the produce department to buy as long as she will eat it when we come home. She picked out a pumpkin!

So, I searched the Weight Watcher's website and found Grandma's Pumpkin Muffins recipe. We baked the pumpkin and then put it in the Magic Bullet to puree. We didn't have any eggs, so we mixed all the wet ingredients together in one bowl and all the dry ingredients in another bowl and waited for the chickens to lay. I used 2 whole eggs instead of the egg substitute. Normally, I would just measure out egg whites to equal the amount of required egg substitute, but I sold 4 dozen eggs yesterday and was short. I also didn't have any nutmeg, so I skipped it. Next time, I will make sure that I have the nutmeg and egg whites. I like things a little sweeter too, so I might add some Stevia to the batter. I might go a little wild and add some orange zest in too. Mom uses orange juice in her pumpkin pies and they are delicious! Over all, they were very moist and good. Daddy refused to even taste them, but Butterbean loved them! We are taking a couple to church tomorrow to share with some friends. Here's the recipe:

Grandma’s Pumpkin Muffins

POINTS® Value: 3 Servings:  12 Preparation Time:  18 min Cooking Time:  25 min Level of Difficulty:  Easy

Nothing says fall like the spice trinity of pumpkin, nutmeg and cloves.

Ingredients

	1 spray(s) cooking spray
	2 cup(s) all-purpose flour
	1 Tbsp baking powder
	1 tsp table salt
	1 tsp baking soda
	1/2 tsp ground cloves
	1 tsp ground cinnamon
	1 tsp ground nutmeg
	2/3 cup(s) unsweetened applesauce
	1 cup(s) canned pumpkin
	2/3 cup(s) sugar
	1/2 cup(s) fat-free egg substitute
	2/3 cup(s) fat-free skim milk

Instructions

• Preheat oven to 400ºF. Coat a 12-hole muffin tin with cooking spray. Line with cupcake wrappers if desired.
  
  
• Combine flour, baking powder, salt , baking soda, cloves, cinnamon and nutmeg in a large bowl.
  
  
• Combine applesauce, pumpkin, sugar, egg substitute and milk in a medium bowl; mix thoroughly with a wooden spoon.
  
  
• Add applesauce mixture to flour mixture and mix until completely incorporated.
  
  
• Pour batter into muffin tins so each hole is about 2/3 full. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes, or until a tester inserted in the center of a muffin comes out clean. Yields 1 muffin per serving.

Notes

• We use both cooking spray and muffin wrappers to prevent any batter from sticking to the top of the pan but you can use a nonstick pan instead, if you prefer.

Got a Gas Grill! Grilled Chicken Leftovers?

Ok, I'm totally frugal and this post may really bother some folks, but I'm going to make a confession and it isn't even "Not Me, Monday!" I have been wanting to get a gas grill for some time and have been looking on Craigslist and in the stores for one to go on sale. It seems like every time I find one for a decent price, we don't have the money at the time. So, a few weeks ago while out on a bike ride with my little Butterbean, I noticed that the neighbor up the street had put a stainless steel gas grill out for the trash. I went home and told my husband, who knows that I am not ashamed to pick up other folks discarded treasures. He was unmoved. I think his exact words were, "You don't even know if it works." Well, my dear friend and fellow treasure hunter, Pam, happened to stop by the house that night. I told her about the grill, and she agreed that we just had to run up the street and bring it home. Yes, we did some late night curb shopping. Yes, we rolled it down the street right past the Sheriff's patrol car that was parked in front of the house next door. Yes, I cleaned it up really well, and it sat there for a couple more weeks waiting for me to get some propane to test it out. I know some of you would never stoop so low as to take a gas grill off of the street, but I figure that I'm just doing my part to keep it out of a landfill...Yeah! That sounds good! I'm environmentally conservative, green and all those other buzz words that are being used today. I'm not cheap. Okay, yes, I am, but still...

Tuesday night, Pam loaned me one of her tanks which  I took and filled up on Wednesday. My hubby helped me set up the tank and I tested her out by grilling up some hamburgers for my stepson and chicken breasts for my lunch today. It works!!! Tonight we at grilled chicken! I made three breasts, one for supper and two for leftovers for me and thighs for everyone else. I cooked the thighs with the skins on them and then pulled them off at the last minute to put BBQ sauce directly on the meat. I dropped the skins on the ground for our dog, but I think the chickens may have gotten more than the dog did.

On Sunday, I'm going to get my husband out there cooking hamburgers and hot dogs. I wonder how my turkey burger will taste grilled?
I'm so excited, because I love grilled food. I love having grilled chicken, because it is so useful! I'm planning on making chicken quesadillas tomorrow for lunch. I ate grilled chicken salad today.  We could do grilled chicken on our Weight Watcher's Alfredo or chicken fried rice. I love chicken salad, but am not too keen on using mayo, even the light kind. My husband isn't big on casseroles, but I could do a pot pie for him. How do you use your leftover grilled chicken? Any great recipe?

New Laws Requiring Calorie Info on Menus

There has been a lot of discussion about the new laws on the east and west coasts of the USA  that require chain restaurants to list calorie information on the menu. The hope is that people will use this information to make healthier choices. This is specifically true for lower income families that tend to frequent fast food joints, because the food is cheap and plentiful. Now the research has been done and it doesn't look good! When given the caloric information on the menu, the average meal contained more calories than before the information was put on the menu. This doesn't bode well for those of us who would love to see the calorie counts on menus in the future! For me, it would really simplify eating out. Sometimes, I don't plan ahead and don't have time to do the online research only to find the place I'm eating doesn't have any nutritional information brochures.

I have a new plan for reducing the waistlines of Americans...instead of putting the calorie info on the menu, let's charge by the calorie! One cent per calorie would work fine! When faced with the choice of a McDonald's Double Cheeseburger with 440 calories ($4.40) or a Premium Bacon Ranch Grilled Chicken Salad with 260 calories ($2.60) which would you choose on a budget? How about the Burger King Double Whopper with cheese for $11.50 or the Veggie Whopper for $3.30? I think if charged by the calorie Americans would make healthier choices!

Another loss!

Lost .8 lbs. this week! I'm thrilled, because this past weekend could have gotten me off plan! How did every one else do this week?

We also talked about spending 2 points on snacks and how to earn 2 activity points. 2 points is about 100 calories, so what are your favorite ways to spend and earn 2 points or 100 calories?
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Real Food!

I love that with Weight Watcher's I can eat real food as opposed to boxed meals that some other plans require. Sure prepackaged meals are great for portion control and convenience, but I like real food. For example, this weekend I went on a ladies beach retreat. We ate out on Thursday night and Saturday lunch, but the rest of the time the meals were prepared by different ladies in the condo. If I had to eat boxed food while everyone else ate the meals prepared for us, I would have been a very unhappy woman. I blew through my weekly points over the weekend, I'm sure, but I also know that I got a good walk in on the beach both days we were down there. I did watch my portions though and tried to eat the healthy options, but Saturday we ate at Lambert's Cafe and I ate until I was miserable! I mostly ate the vegetables and took the chicken home as you can see from the picture. They give you a whole breast, but do cook it without the skin which is great! I had chicken salad made of the side that I had eaten off. I'm not sure what to do with the other half, maybe quesadillas today for lunch? Next time I go to Lamberts, I'm ordering the Veggie plate. It is a choice of 4 veggies/side items plus all the rolls and "pass arounds" you can eat. Honestly, the chicken wasn't that good; the green beans, cucumber and onions, fried potatoes, cabbage and fried okra were much better than the meat.  If you like country/southern cooking, Lambert's is the place to go! We will see Wednesday how it all went.

How was your weekend?

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I did not make my husband go bra shopping on our Wednesday night date night, no matter what he says! I would never do that even if he is great at finding the right size in a sea of wrong sized bras. I surely don't think it might be, because he is a computer geek. I definitely would not then talk about our not going bra shopping at Bible study the next week with three other ladies and a man.

I certainly would not feed my precious child PB&J on waffles because we ran out of bread, repeatedly until I was able to get to the store, several days later.

I am not now known as "The Chicken Woman" by the newcomers to our church, because I do not offer free eggs to anyone and everyone that will take them. No, my ten hens do not produce way more eggs that our family, extended family, friends and neighbors can eat. I also have not harassed my husband repeatedly about making sure that he lets out the hens and collects the eggs while I was away this past weekend.

Wednesday Weigh In, a Challenging Weekend Ahead and the Biggest Loser

I'm happy to report a loss today. I'm sad that it was only half a pound, actually .6 of a pound, but still it is a loss. I wasn't expecting much since I normally have a big loss followed by a small gain or no loss. Maybe the bike riding kept me from having a gain this week.

This weekend is going to be challenging for me though. I'm going on a ladies retreat to Orange Beach, Alabama this weekend. The ladies have teamed up to prepare meals for the weekend and we are going to go out to lunch on Saturday at Lambert's Cafe, Home of the Throwed Rolls. I'm planning on ordering the grilled chicken, because how can I go wrong with chicken right? HA! That is what I thought when I ordered the grilled chicken at supper tonight at Vera's Seafood Restaurant in Slidell, LA. The menu said that it was grilled chicken breast with BBQ sauce, mushrooms and topped with cheese. What it was though was a perfectly healthy chicken breast swimming in grease. Don't get me wrong, it was delish! But I don't know why they had to ruin a perfectly good chicken breast with grease. What is funny is that when I ordered the vegetables that go on the side, I specifically asked if they were prepared with oil or steamed. I also ordered my salad dressing on the side. I just assumed that a grilled chicken breast would be a low fat choice.

I will ask the wait person at Lambert's before I order how the chicken breast is cooked and request that they use a minimal amount of oil in cooking. I hate doing this. I hate to feel like I'm being high maintenance or picky, but I need to know that I'm doing the best for my body and I love catching those "Throwed Rolls", so I need to save some points for one of those. How do you handle  eating out? Do you feel like you are giving the wait staff the fifth degree?

Where are my Biggest Loser fans? I absolutely love this show!!! Sadly, I don't love exercise enough to workout until I puke. Do you find it inspirational or frustrating knowing that what they are living is not real life?

Recycled Wardrobe!

On Monday, Merry Perennial posted about the conflict we losers have with getting rid of all of our fat clothes while losing. So often, we have gained and lost and gained again that we hate to get rid of the clothes just to have to buy new fat clothes. Let me give you a hint...find someone bigger than you to give the clothes to or better yet, someone bigger who is on a weight loss journey too. Then go out and find someone who is your new size and on a WL journey to be friends with. :) You don't have the guilt of getting rid of clothes, because you gave them to someone who needs them and you can still be cheap because someone is giving you clothes. Win/Win! Except for the skinniest of your group who has to buy all the new clothes, so she can give her clothes to you! I'm in this exact triangle of sharing right now. I just wish that my friends had my taste in clothes...my skinny friend is old enough to be my mom and my larger friend is a total tomboy. Oh well, the clothes are free!

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

So here goes...I would never run screaming into the house at my husband to come kill the snake out by the chicken coop. I had a snake try to climb in my shirt on stage while doing an animal show at Disney without flinching, so of course seeing a snake near my sweet hens would not send me screaming like a girl. Not me.

I absolutely did not tell my dear Butterbean that if she did not stop whining that she wanted more gumballs, I would leave her at home the next time Mommy decided to go for a bike ride. I mean what kind of mom buys her child sherbet with gumballs anyway.

I do not get so obsessed with every pound lost that I do not get on the scale two and three times a day especially after going number two, just to see if there is a major, miraculous change in my weight, not me!

So, how about you? What are you not doing?

Sunday Bike Ride

We rode the bike to the trail head where there is a small park. Butterbean loves to slide on the wavy slide. Although she did get a little bored on the ride over, it was worth the trip. We stopped at the "quickstop" (a southern term for gas station). Butterbean got a sherbet and I got a water. I contemplated getting an energy bar or beef jerky, but did not want to pay the price in both dollars and points.
We hopped back on the bike and rode home. Both of us tired, she started whining about half way home. I stopped the bike and threatened to leave her home next time if she didn't stop. She did, and before I knew it she was telling me that the rhythmic humming of the bike chain sounded like music. She sang "Mary Had a Little Lamb" for a mile or so. She was asleep by the time we turned onto our street.
Total distance today 8 miles.
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Lost 2.5 Pounds This Week!

I'm so excited! I got another 5 lb. Star! That makes a total of 41 lbs. doing Weight Watchers and 70 lbs. total! I also took a 8.56 mile bike ride.
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My new exercise buddy!

She keeps me pedaling!
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Virtual Me!

Prevention Magazine has a virtual model program to help you visualize you current weight and goal weight. I did it and here is my model. I must admit though it doesn't look like my actual body so much. I think they are being overly nice, by not photographing real people at my weight and putting it up there. My body has more of a rolling shape with lots of bumps and lumps, but it is really nice to see what I could look like. The pictures are in the following order: Starting weight 339#, Current 272# and Goal 150#.

Have you tried it? What are your thoughts?

Nanny state snatches kids for being too fat

Nanny state snatches kids for being too fat

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After reading this news article, I feel completely conflicted. Prior to getting on the Metformin and starting Weight Watchers, I would have been completely angry and saddened by a government that would take away the kids from their parents. Now, I'm conflicted. As a fat person who has a medical problem that took 37 years to diagnose, I know the pain of having a medical condition that causes weight gain that can't be controlled. On the other hand, I found out what the problem is, got serious and started working on the problem. Losing weight isn't easy, but it is possible. So, I'm conflicted. I can't imagine being deemed an unfit parent because of my weight or because my child was obese. As a fat child of fat parents, I can't imagine how the children must feel either. I'm trying to change my family tree by losing weight. My desire is to teach my child healthy habits that will follow her through her life.

What are your thoughts? How does this story make you feel about your weight loss journey?

Lovely Blog Awards!!!

I want to thank Downsizing Doc for giving me a Lovely Blog award! She is truly an inspiration to me!

Now for my awards in no particular order:

1. Art Projects for Kids
2. Skinny Hollie
3. I Am A Money Magnet
4. Merry Perennial
5. A Tale of Two Kittehs on Weight Watchers
6. My Picture of Health Journey
7. Lynn's Charmed Ones
   
8. Sunshine Mama
   
9. Happy Texans
10. No More Stinking Thinking
11. Festively Plump All Year Long

VID 00007-20090910-2011

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Junk Drawers Every Where!

One of the ladies in my church has a daughter just 5 months older than my sweet lil one and the other day her child was wearing the cutest little pillowcase dress. I found this lovely blog by Susan Petersen with information on how to make a pillowcase dress. Anyway, the one my friend's little girl had on was black with gold ribbons, a perfect little New Orleans Saints dress! So, I decided I had to do this too. I found an adorable print pillowcase at Dollar General today. (Did I say that I wasn't going shopping yesterday? Well, I had to anyway, because Butterbean has lost all but her black patent leather church shoes. I ended up at the grocery too, because we can't go all week without milk.) Anyway, I got home and got out the sewing machine and found ribbons that would match and started setting up to sew. I realized that the foot of my machine is missing. I remember my dear child playing with it at some point in the past year and taking it away from her. I remember putting it in a junk drawer for safe keeping, but for the life of me, I can't find it! I actually ended up running to a sewing store and spending $5 on a new one. I did get the dress made as you can see from the picture of my little one. I used ribbons instead of the bias tape, but the concept is the same.

My problem lies in the fact that I don't have just one junk draw; I have several! I have drawers, baskets, boxes and bins. Organization is a mystery to me! I read an article recently about organization and how it related to obesity. Yes, Organizing Guru Pet er Walsh has even written a book about how clutter makes you fat.
Watch CBS Videos Online I'm going to request his book from my local library and see what it says! Maybe I can tame the junk drawers!

On the other hand, Freud said that such disorganization, like obesity, can also be aggression towards others. So, maybe I'm just being aggressive toward my family? Nah, because my husband loves me fat and all. He doesn't love the clutter, but then again, he doesn't do anything to help get rid of it either.

So here is a little informal poll: Do you have a clutter problem along with your weight problem? Do you feel it is an aggressive act to be disorganized?

Progress Photos

I have been asked several times for progress photos, so this post is going to be an ongoing post with my progress photos all in one spot. It makes it easier for me to see the difference in my body this way. Here they are so far with dates for each.

Food Find! Dove Miniatures Ice Cream

I have a new secret pleasure! Actually, it isn't so secret if I'm sharing with Butterbean and blogging about it. Yum! My daughter and I found these at Wal-Mart. They are individually wrapped, so perfect portion control! The serving size is 5 pieces, but one is just enough for a chocolate fix. Sixty calories, four grams of fat and one gram of fiber makes them one point wonders!

They also sell a milk chocolate variety pack that has vanilla and chocolate chips, but I'm dark chocolate kind of gal.

Butterbean and I both like the ones with chocolate ice cream the best. What is your secret pleasure?

1 Point Potato Soup

I LOVE potato soup. My mom always made a potato soup when I was growing up that had potatoes, onions, Velveeta and milk. (5 points/cup) I love it, but really the points aren't worth it to me. So, I have been hearing about this one point potato soup made with country gravy mix for a couple of months, but never could track down the recipe. Yesterday, my sister called and asked if I had seen this recipe. She gave it to me over the phone, so I made it this morning. I put the ingredients in the WW Recipe Builder and was pleasantly surprised with the 1 point per cup count! With just one point per cup, I can add a little grated cheese and bacon or faux sour cream (fat free Greek yogurt)!

So, here's the recipe!

1 30 oz. bag Ore-Ida O'Brien Hash Browns with peppers and onions (my sister doesn't like onions and peppers and used the Southern Style Hash Browns, but I love the onions and peppers)

2 cans of fat free chicken broth

1 packet of country gravy mix

Put hash browns and broth in the crock pot and cook on low for 4-8 hours. Mix in the gravy mix into the crock pot and cook 10-20 more minutes. Serve with grated cheese, sour cream, bacon or green onions.

Be sure you count any points for the add-ins!

Weigh-in Wednesday

Well, today is my weigh-in day, but I have a child with a 102 degree fever. So, do I run to town 10 miles one way, sick child in tow, to weigh in and just skip the meeting, or do I skip it today and see how she is feeling tomorrow? She doesn't act like she is feeling badly since she has taken her medicine. The doctor's office said that since this has only been going on since Monday that they don't need she her unless she gets much worse. I think they are super busy this week. I guess we will just stay home today and see if she is better tomorrow.

Besides that, I'm not seeing any change in my home scale this week, so there will probably be no change on their scale. I really wanted to lose 2 lbs this week, so I can hit my 40 lb. WW's milestone and my 70 lb. overall milestone. Funny thing is if I do hit the 40 lb. loss, I want to do it on a regular meeting day so I can celebrate with my WW buddies! I don't want to celebrate with a different group. If someone had told me that I would feel this camaraderie about the people in my meeting back in April, I would have laughed at them, but I have the best group of folks at the Wednesday meeting!

Hope everyone is having a great week!
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Playing Refrigerator Survivor this Week!

Here lies the entire contents of my refrigerator: Sam's Choice Cola (the men's) Bar-S Franks (again the men's), an almost empty sippy cup of milk (Butterbean's), various types of cheese, match stick carrots, bok choy, eggs, Oroweat Sandwich Thins, parsnips (bought for the fruit and veggie challenge at WW, still hanging in there -Anyone have a good recipe?), ham, bologna, turkey pepperoni, canned biscuits, iceberg lettuce, coconut milk, assorted condiments and pickles. My freezer is better stocked with chicken breasts, pork loin chops, ground beef, some leftovers and such. My pantry has the normal canned stuff, ramen noodles (my stepson swore he'd eat them, but hasn't), popcorn and cereal. So since my husband is going out of town tomorrow for the week, my stepson is going to be staying with his mama and I'm going to pack my daughter off to Grandma's on Tuesday morning until "one of starts to miss the other" (which for me will be Wednesday, but she can go much longer)...and the budget is rather tight this week anyway, I am going to play Refrigerator Survivor this week! The idea is to eat what is on hand without going grocery shopping for the entire week. Sadly, I know that I will have to make a stop on Tuesday for some produce, because I just can't survive on canned and frozen all week long. I'm so excited! It is going to be like when I was a single teacher waiting for the end of the month to get my paycheck!

We have also decided to do a book study on Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover at church starting in October. I read it this past summer and have been trying to get my husband on board with the budgeting and saving. He has FINALLY agreed that it is something we need to do seriously. So, we are going to get the book and workbook for each family who is interested and start the class in October. I'm thrilled! Not so much about having to live on a budget, but about getting control over our spending and starting to save money. Refrigerator Survivor fits right in to this, because in the past when my husband would go out of town, I would just end up eating out all the time instead of cooking. I'm going to keep a running total of what I am saving by eating at home this week and put that into our savings account or maybe my bicycle account, since I haven't had any serious inquiries about the treadmill on Craigslist.

I'll try to post some of the creative meals that I come up with this week and let you all know how it goes!

I'm with Garfield on This One!

Sorry for it being so blurry, but I guess those Yahoo! comics folks don't want people stealing their stuff. It says: First box, "Ah!" Second, "Eggs!" Third box, "Now where's the nest with the bacon?"
This made me smile because a) I have chickens and have carried and dropped many eggs like this and b) who doesn't like bacon??? Hope everyone is having a great weekend! My stress levels are slowly going down. I think, or maybe I'm putting Keeven's advice into action and managing it.

Chores and Stress Eating!

After having a wonderful day on Wednesday, it ended with a bang or rather an argument with my husband concerning his son who moved in with us a couple of weeks ago. While I'm not a neat freak, I do like things clean and tidy which seems to be impossible with a three year old and working three, yes, three part time jobs. Enter a 20 year old step-son, who leaves dirty socks, t-shirts, shorts, games, empty soda cans and candy boxes in my living room. On top of that, the yard isn't mowed and the dishes in the sink are overflowing; both chores that my son and husband are avoiding. I tell them, "If you get up from eating and go do the dishes immediately, it takes about 15 minutes." They ignore me. We used Chore Buster to divvy up the chores and since I do all the cooking in the house, I only have to clean the kitchen once or twice a week. Personally, I'm all about deadlines, but neither of the men in my house are. I feel like chores should be completed ASAP and not be put off. "Do what you have to, so you can do what you want to do." is my motto. Anyway, it has been determined that if I have a problem with my stepson, I am to complain about it to my husband and let him handle it. Any suggestions on how you handle chores in your house would be deeply appreciated!

So, with all the stress at home, I have been stress eating. Today is day 3 in my week and I have 16 flex points left for the week. I'm going to have to behave myself this week. I have got to get back on schedule. Tonight we are having dinner at church which normally throws my week off. I need to learn to stay in my points when eating other people's cooking. Anyone else struggle with this?

Update! The yard appears to have been mowed!

2.2 Pounds More!!! Gone that is!!!

WooHoo! I'm down to 271.8#! Only one more and I will get another 5# star. I just live for those stars! I know it is just a silly gold star, but it represents something to me. I heard of one WWer who would buy a 5# bag of sugar every time she lost 5# and would put it on her counter as a reminder of what she had lost. While that is kind of a cool reminder, I'm not sure that I want to waste counter space on (currently) thirteen bags of sugar. By the time I hit my ultimate goal that would be a LOT of sugar! If only I could afford gold bars. I could put them on the counter. They are more dense, so they wouldn't take up as much space and in the end, I would have a nice little nest egg. As of today and at today's prices, I would have $1,043,368.32 of gold in my kitchen and you know what? That is about the right value for the weight I have lost.

My! aren't I Little Miss Sunshine today? Yuck! What is up with that! I guess I'm just pleased with my losses so far. I'm averaging 1.7# per week which I'm happy with. On the home-front, I'm ready to beat my twenty year old stepson for not doing his share around the house, but other than that, I'm in a pretty good mood.

Oh! While I am thinking about it, do you like prizes? I do!!! Prior Fat Girl has a giveaway going on for a cook book and apron. She has a couple of really great looking recipes on her blog from the cookbook too. Now, go to her blog and check it out, cook you up some chicken or fish, but if you win...ok, I'll still be happy for you.

God is blessing us! I just had a knock on the door. A lady that I met through Freecycle just came by to drop off a bike and a scooter for my daughter! I'm so excited! My little girl has been saving up for a bike for a long time now. I'm so excited to be able to give her one in the mean time while she saves up for a bigger one in the future! God is good!

Lee's Chili Cheeseburger! or Don't Let Yourself Get Ravenous!

I blew through a lot of points today! I normally don't do that on the day before a weigh-in, but today I did. I woke up around 7am this morning hungry, so I fixed myself an egg sandwich on rye bread; 2 slices of bread, 1 egg and 1 egg white, 1 slice of cheese (regular-we were out of the low fat) and mustard. 7 points total.

I got to work and got busy. I could feel a migraine coming on. I don't get many migraines and ran out of the medicine over a year ago. Anyway, I started getting sick to my stomach and decided to treat it with ibuprofen and a cup of coffee. It helped, but all the caffeine mixed with my Metformin made my blood sugar sink. Had I been thinking clearly, I would have dug in my purse for a snack. I wasn't thinking clearly. There were too many people in my office, too much confusion and the pounding on my skull wasn't helping. I did look in my desk for a snack, but it was empty.

By the time I got off, I was starving! Normally, I get off at 12:30 on Tuesdays, so I can make the deposit, but the there were too many people in my office for me to get done with what I needed to accomplish. I ended up staying well after 1pm. Then I had to run into the bank to deposit the coins from the children's offering. It was edging closer to 2pm. I was reaching into my purse looking for a wipe for my hands and came across a 100 calorie pack of almond! WooHooo! 2points! I would have the energy to go shopping before getting lunch. Bad move there!

I go into the Bike Zone to shop for a new bike, but the sales people were too busy to even acknowledge that I was even there. For that reason, I doubt I will be making a purchase from them. Then I went to the bank to deposit my paycheck and over to Wal-Mart to pick up a few groceries. The hunger started creeping in again. I decided to get something to eat at a fast food place. Sonic? Nah, too much mayo. Chick-Fil-A? Nope, had that yesterday. McDonald's? Nope, their healthy stuff isn't even worth buying. Just go home and eat soup! Then it hit me! Lee's Hamburger! It just opened across the street from Wal-Mart. I had the cash! I don't know about the new place, but Lee's in Slidell doesn't take debit cards. So, I did it! I ordered the chili cheeseburger and it was good. I tried to calculate the points in my head, but I don't eat quarter pound burgers anymore. When I got home, I tracked my points! 16 for the burger. Thank goodness I didn't order fries and a soda with that.

I ate a turkey burger for supper with baked Cheetos. 8 points Then at Bible Study, we had pear pie with ice cream. 7 points for a sliver of pie and a spoonful of ice cream.

I don't know how this will look on the scale tomorrow, but I learned something. Don't let yourself get to that point. You know the point...where your brain checks out, your stomach makes the decisions and your hands shake just enough that you don't spill too much of the yummy chili and shredded cheddar on your shirt! Bring a lunch or a snack!

On another note, I posted a for sale or trade for my treadmill on Craigslist. I would love to get a few bucks or trade it for a bike. I really feel like the treadmill is boring for me and it is taking up a huge amount of space in the bedroom. It wouldn't be a big deal if my stepson had not moved in with us, but now that he is here and my daughter is lost her room for him, she is sleeping in our room. Part of me says, I should keep the treadmill and get a bike, but I don't know. We shall see what happens! If it sells, it sells. If it doesn't sell, then I will start putting the money that I make from selling eggs away to buy a bike.

Accepting Weight Loss Complements

Breakfast today was one scrambled egg with low fat cheese and mustard on an Orowhet Sandwich Thin - 4 points.

I'm feeling all weird and emotional today. My breasts hurt and I'm crampy. Sometimes I hate being a woman! I got all emotional when my WW leader asked about setting a new goal even though I had already set one for myself. Something about putting it down in their system freaked me out. I told her that I wanted to go for another 10%, but really I want to hit 250 pounds which is about 2 lbs. less than the 10%. Not that 2 lbs. makes a huge difference.

I'm under 275 lbs. Do you know how hard it is to admit that knowing that a couple of my friends in real life read my blog? (Love you Lynn and Nancy) I haven't been here in over five years! Wow! I don't really feel different yet. My knee isn't bothering me as much as it did a year ago, but then again I don't have to carry a 30lb. kid up the stairs twice a week at work. My clothes are much looser and some don't fit at all, but I don't have the tons of energy that people claim they have when they lose 65lbs.

I'm still very bothered by complements about my weight loss. I post my success and failures on Facebook and this blog. I have tons of folks rooting for me, but it really makes me uncomfortable. Is it a fear of failure or just a feeling of not being worthy? Sometimes when I read their complements, I feel like they are saying, "Yeah, if you hadn't hit the drive thru so often, you wouldn't need to lose weight." Or, "Whoopee for you! Ya fat slob!"

Complements from my pastor are the worst! He is thin, never had to deal with this struggle, so I don't know that he totally understands what it is like. It really bugs me when he comments on it. I know his wife understands. She did WW for 9 months. She and I never really talked about it until today. I don't know why I didn't feel like I could talk to her about it.

Do you sometimes feel like you don't want people complementing you on your success? Do you feel like you can't talk to someone who has been down the road that you are now traveling and who has succeeded? How do you deal with complements?

I'm not a second class citizen!

I woke up to one of my strange dreams this morning. I was back in high school getting another degree. I know it doesn't make sense, but it was a dream. Anyway, I'm back at my old high school, but living in an apartment. One of my old teachers, who gave me a hard time in high school, walks into my apartment with "proof" that my parents and my family including me are worthless people. Evidently, my parents' name was put in the local paper as owing money to someone, but it was a mistake. This teacher, I'll call him Frank, was going on and on about how I'm worthless and he has proof. My friend, Karen, was there and she wasn't saying anything, but I was embarrassed because she was hearing him go on and on about this. So, I got mad and started yelling back at him. I told him that I was not a second class citizen and if he wanted to discuss this with me we would do so in his office, not my apartment. We start heading out the door and through the grocery store where I evidently lived in the back of for some reason. Only this grocery store was very different. It had wooden slats for the floor so when customers walked across the floor it made music. Well, I was chasing Frank out of the store and making a ton of noise, so one of the managers was yelling at me to slow down. I finally get out of the store and head to my car where I see a man trying to break into the backdoor. He doesn't hear me come up so I stomp on his hand which had a toy gun in it and scream, "I'm not a second class citizen!"

Anyone care to interpret that for me? I think that several issues in my life has always made me feel like I was a second class citizen: my weight, my financial stupidity, my working class upbringing. I have always felt like I wasn't deserving of praise or admiration. I felt like I would always be less of a person than other people. I'm not a second class citizen though. God doesn't view me as one and neither should I.

Lost 2.6 this week! WooHoo! I was really surprised, because I only got to exercise once this week and overall it has been a rough week. I just never know with my body. Does that mean that I should not exercise and overeat every week? Yeah! I mean no. My body is probably catching up from the exercise that I did the week before when I didn't lose anything. I'm just happy to have lost this week.

Tuesday Check-in

It has been a crazy week. I didn't lose any weight at my Wednesday Weigh-in, so I was kind of bummed about that since I had earned 19 activity points; then again, I didn't gain any either, so that is good. Wednesday, I attended a property tax meeting to protest raising the millage for the local fire station. There was a pretty good crowd for a 5:30pm meeting there to protest the millage increase, but they did it anyway. Scary thing was our local area has 3 fire stations each contains 5-6 different pieces of equipment, but only 1-3 people are on duty at each fire station at one time. It doesn't compute! Why have all that equipment if you have no one to operate it? I also attended an altered journal workshop at the library that evening. This was really cool. Our teacher, Anna Marie, was very informative. She is one of those literary/artistic people that works in a book store. Just a really cool evening, I had out with a friend. I love doing mixed media art and have wanted to do some altered journal/books, but time and supplies are limited. Also, Glenn Beck has been encouraging his listeners to get a Moleskin and keep a journal about what America was like in our day and time. While I would love to buy a real Moleskine, I opted to use a sketch book that I already had and a less expensive journal that I purchased recently at Barnes and Noble. I decided to take the time and work on one. I will post pictures as they progress.

Thursday, I was able to have a pretty normal day with a 40 minute walk on the Trace, but I was feeling a little out of sorts. Well Friday, I found out why. I ended up sick and in bed Friday evening and Saturday.

Sunday, we had church and then a wedding and more church, so no walk and no down time. Monday was a comedy of errors too. My husband's battery died and I had to go to Covington to help him get a new one. We ended up eating at McDonald's inside Wal-Mart. Has anyone noticed how expensive McDonald's is getting? Sure, I can order off the dollar menu, but everything else has sky-rocketed in price when I think about the nutritional value of it. Maybe it is just me, but if I'm going to spend $15 for the three of us to eat, I'm better off cooking for myself. We can have steak for less than $15. Last night was just horrible. Butterbean has come down with a cold. She started out in her bed, but came to ours around midnight. She spent the night sniffling, crying and kicking. Alan finally gave up sleeping in the bed with us and went to the living room. We got up this morning and went to work where I attempted to keep the yellow snot off of her, me and the office equipment. The pastor let me leave early, so I could get her home and in bed after watching her cling to me. I'm driving home after just telling Butterbean's grandma that no I won't be taking her to the doctor, because they probably won't do anything for her anyway when a news report comes on about the Swine Flu vaccine that will be coming out soon. So now, I am wondering if I should take her to the doctor? What is a mom to do? No fever yet, so I'm waiting on spending the co-pay only to be told that can't do anything for her.

So, tomorrow, we will see if I get my next 5lb. star. That will take me to 35 lbs lost at WW and total 64 lbs. People have been asking for progress pics, so here is one taken on August 3, 2009. This is my 5k Summer Beach Run tank which is an XL size, the biggest that they had. I'll try to remember to take another picture on September 3rd with the same shirt and hopefully, we will see some progress.

Who I Am Hates Who I've Been

I walked 3.92 miles today and it feels great! I love mapping out new walks using MapMyRun.com. Some bloggers post their maps on their blogs, but since I start and end at my house, I'm not willing to do that. I do post photos from along the route, so if you were really savvy with computers, I'm sure you could find me now that Google has Street View online. Today's photo comes from the same house with the Giggle swing. It is hard to make out in the photo, but it says, "Don't Think So Much! Smile!" I love it! It kind of makes me wonder if they did that to annoy a neighbor? We have a great variety of folks living in our neighborhood from the little shack on the corner to the McMansion in the back of the neighborhood. Oh well, it makes me smile.

What else makes me smile as I walk and sweat and walk and sweat (hey, it's August in southern Louisiana!) is my playlist that I created to work out. I have a good mix of fast and slow songs, so I can do intervals. Some of the songs were selected because of the words, some just for the beat, other just because I like that I get to spend time with God alone on my walks. One song, "Who I am Hates Who I've Been" by Relient K, seems to really be hitting home to me today.

"Who I Am Hates Who I've Been"

I watched the proverbial sunrise
Coming up over the Pacific and
You might think I'm losing my mind,
But I will shy away from the specifics...

'cause I don't want you to know where I am
'cause then you'll see my heart
In the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

[Pre-Chorus]
Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it.
See that line. Well I never should have crossed it.
Stop right there. Well I never should have said
That it's the very moment that
I wish that I could take back.

[Chorus]
I'm sorry for the person I became.
I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again
'cause who I am hates who I've been.
Who I am hates who I've been.

I talk to absolutely no one.
Couldn't keep to myself enough.
And the things bottled inside have finally begun
To create so much pressure that I'll soon blow up.

I heard the reverberating footsteps
Synching up to the beating of my heart,
And I was positive that unless I got myself together,
I would watch me fall apart.

And I can't let that happen again
'cause then you'll see my heart
In the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

[Pre-Chorus x2]
[Chorus]

Who I am hates who I've been
And who I am will take the second chance you gave me.
Who I am hates who I've been
'cause who I've been only ever made me...

So sorry for the person I became.
So sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again
'cause who I am hates who I've been.
Who I am hates who I've been.

The line drawn in the sand as far as eating habits for me goes back to kindergarten. My family had gone to McDonald's which in and of itself was very rare at that stage in my life. I had been watching too much TV and seen the commercials for Big Mac's. You remember the one, "Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese. . . " When Mom asked me what I wanted, I told her that I wanted a Big Mac. She told me that there was no way that I could eat a whole Big Mac, so I set out to prove her wrong. I did it. Looking back I consumed 580 calories plus I'm sure I had fries and a drink. That is way too much for a 6 year old! I know that that first Big Mac was not the only reason I am obese, but it was a turning point in my life. It was me taking control of my eating habits. I wish I could take that moment back. I am sorry for the person I have been, but I am ready to make sure I don't continue on that path and that is a good thing!

Women's Health Magazine 100 Calorie Snack Quiz

I just had to go and take this quiz! Women's Health Magazine has a 100 calorie snack quiz where they show two different photos of a snack and give a description. I had to pick the snack that has 100 calories. Well, I took it and scored 19 out of 24. Not too bad, right? Then I thought about what this means. It means that Weight Watcher's has taught me a lot about portions and calorie content of food. It also means that I have the head knowledge; I just need to make sure that I put it into practice in my life! Take the quiz and tell me how you do!

Exercise Confession

Can I confess something? I hate to exercise. LOL Ok, so most of you figured that out the first time you met me. It is boring and tiresome, and I would love to be doing something else. I also hate, hate hate sweating and body odor! I have come to the point in my life though that I realize that it is also a must. Since I have been exercising, I do feel better. My clothes fit differently and my body looks different. I can tell a difference on the days that I do and don't exercise. I sleep better. Yup, all the stuff that the exercise experts tell us about exercise, they are all true. Dang it!

I have decided that I'm going to track how many miles I walk this month and see how far I can go. Here is the month as it stands so far:

Date	Distance in miles	Total
8/1	3.1	3.1
8/2	2.5	5.6
8/3	1.9	7.5
8/4	0.55	8.05
8/5	3	11.05
8/6	0	11.05
8/7	2.5	13.55
8/8	2.5	16.05

I am also chronicling these walks in photos which I will share here. The Giggle swing is on my Tranquility walk. Tranquility is the name of the subdivision. That swing always makes me smile. One day the owners of that swing are going to find me out there swinging and giggling. I wonder if they will mind?

Lost 2.8 Pounds This Week!

WooHoo! I lost 2.8 lbs. and my leader said, "You'll hit 35 pounds next week." I sure hope so! The 35 lbs. doesn't take into account the 29 lbs. that I lost before officially joining Weight Watchers, so my total now is 63 lbs.! That is twice the size of my little girl!

So, why then after I see a success, do I beat myself up over spending the money on Weight Watchers? I'm on the monthly plan which costs $39.99/month. This is going to be a tight month financially for us with my two adult stepsons moving in with us. Anyone who has fed teenager boys can attest to the increase our grocery budget is feeling. One will be starting college at the end of the month, so I have to budget for him to buy some new clothes and supplies too. So, then I ask myself, do we have the money to continue Weight Watchers? Alan said, "Can your really put a price on your health?" I guess I just feel guilty spending that money on me. Or maybe it is that I would rather spend that money on other things like:

1. A new bike for me and one for Butterbean. I would love to have one of those retro cruiser style bikes or one of those adult tricycles. I love those adult tricycles! I know it is strange, but they are so functional with the basket in the back. It's like riding a giant purse! I love purses!
2. Speaking of purses, I bought a Butler Bag from Kmart. I love it, but the material is very cheaply made and the color is peeling off of it. I would love to get a real leather one. A girl's gotta have dreams!
   
3. This one is more of a need than a want: I need some new bras. I hate buying them, because they are so expensive and the comfortable ones look like something my mother would wear. I really want some pretty ones, but for now I just need some that fit properly. The ones I have have been tightened as far as they can go, but there isn't much I can do about my shrinking girls except gain weight and that is NOT an option!
4. OK another need: I really need to go see a doctor about my knee. I injured it in college and lately it has been bothering me (part of the reason I got serious about losing weight, because what is the first thing any doctor is going to say to a 339 lbs woman who comes in and complains that her knee hurts? Lose weight!) I hate to go, because I'm sure it is going to involve X-rays and possibly long needles into the cartilage, and I doubt that I will have my daddy's shoulder to cry on like the last time they did that to me. I won't even have my husband's shoulder to cry on when the bill comes, because he would just fuss about how much he hates doctors. Besides, if I do go and the doctor does tell me to lose weight, I might deck him!

Anyway, tell me about how you deal with the expense of paying for a weight loss program? Or are you doing it on your own?